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FuddledFox

Vibe Vibe Awards 2020

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Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the 2020 Vibe Awards.

You will notice that because of the ‘rona we have had to make some changes this year. So instead of the traditional 90,000 sell out at Wembley we haven’t been able to sell tickets to the fans so we are coming live from the back room of The Green Dragon on the outskirts of Cheltenham. We are following all social distancing protocols though with our nominees spaced well apart mainly to stop any fights breaking out. We also have Donald Trump serving pints of bleach from the bar in an attempt to keep us all healthy and to make a bit of extra cash to keep the taxman at bay.

Unfortunately Sexy Sue was unable to join us this year due to quarantine rules and the need to self isolate when she arrived from Thailand. So instead we have Handsome Rob on the red carpet this year and hopefully he will be able to get a few words with some ofthe nominees as they arrive.

So let’s cut to the Red Carpet, good evening Handsome Rob.

Amongst the smart, recently hoovered, pristine red carpet stands a lone figure in a hazmat suit, with a bag of sweets in one hand and a megaphone in the other. The man raises the megaphone and pulls his mask back enough to speak.

Rob: ‘Handsome Rob here, having to wear this clobber in our Covid-safe Red Carpet Ceremony.  Hang on, is that one of our new member nominees. Yes, it is.’

RichD wanders on over.

Rob: ‘Hello Mr RichD. Sorry about the megaphone. I’m trying to keep to social distancing. Hopefully I don’t deafen you. Anyway, you’ve done a lot of stuff on the forum since you’ve been here and recently joined the Triple Crown, but the thing that has always bothered me Mr D is... what makes you so rich? I imagine you breed exotic turtles or steal shirts from Newcastle fans in the winter and sell them. Please enlighten me?’

RichD: ‘Say it again mate? I think this would help if you turned the megaphone on mate.’

RichD walks over to Rob to make him turn it on

RichD: ‘I have just joined the triple crown and I honestly feel like I’ve worked harder on that than my actual job since I’ve joined here 👀

Well the weirdest thing about this is, that yes I do actually have an exotic breed of turtles in my island, but not only that, I was brought up by turtles until the age of 12, I’ve lived a very weird life thus far. Anyway back to how I made the millions, I actually married in to money, I’m Mike Ashley’s husband, sorry it had to come out here!’

Rob feints to the floor in a loud bang, then slowly gets to his feet as RichD makes his departure.

Rob: ‘Well, that’s certainly an exclusive.’

 

Rob looks over and sees a younger lad looking disorientated and beckons him over.

Rob: ‘Sandwich, Broodje, Lord... whatever you are called. It’s nice to see you’ve got here and didn’t get as lost as all of your saves over the past year. I would say it’s a pleasure to see you, but...

So my question is, have you looked everywhere for your saves? Under the duvet? In the fridge? Top shelf of the cupboard? You never know where they will appear. Maybe you’ll sneak in to the toilet during tonight’s ceremony and find one in the wash basin.’

Broodje: ‘I did Rob. I even looked for it on my girlfriend’s phone just in case. I looked under my bed, inside my lotion stocks, BatiGoal’s leaked nudes and even inside Fabio Silva’s trophy cabinets (he got quite a few). I still can’t find it.

In the end saves are like a Sandwich. You screw it up? Eat it and make a new one. Lost it? Make a new one. Not enough? Make a new one.’

Rob: ‘I find it disturbing that you eat your saves. You cannibal. I worryyou’ll eat my megaphone. One final question, if you could lose anything else that you own, what would it be?’

Broodje: ‘I did lose my physics book a few times. I’m expecting to lose it again.’

Rob: ‘Thanks Lord Kip. You should have brought your Geography books so you don’t get lost on the way in. Have a great evening... and remember to read the rules on the way in.’

 

Rob looks across and sees a man frantically playing football manager on his tablet.

Rob: ‘Kanegan, if I could grab you away from posting another career and ask you a question or two that’d be great.’

Kanegan: ‘Oh, hi Rob.’

Rob: ‘Hey! It’s... it’s gotta be Kane. Welcome to the ceremony my friend. Sadly we have to stick to social distancing rules otherwise I’d be offering you one of my Haribo. 

Now, you’re known for churning out career after career to the point that I often wondered if you need your own forum. So, I waswondering, what do you spending the other five minutes of the days doing when you aren’t sleeping or playing FMM?’

Kanegan: ‘Well taking a shit while playing FMM and doing my job while thinking about FMM. 

All my minutes are connected to FMM in some way so i was heartbroken when I had to take a sabbatical but I am back and the Big..... Red...... Machine is ready to unleash hell. 

Kanegan comes across a fake Kane in the road and tries to teach him the precautions in this corona era but get badly beaten up instead. 

Rob: ‘Well, uh, we don’t condone violence here. But I guess that what pressure leads to! It does lead on to my final question, actually. If everyone in the forum was in a Royal Rumble, who would you fancy to win and why?’

Kane: ‘Of course the Big Red Machine which is..... me although I could make way for my Brother of Destruction but he is in Death Valley taking a stroll and it is for him the bell tolls but in this day and age the question is how would he tackle the trolls?

Well I would leave all of you to answer that and I would get myself a Red Bull because Red Machine needs Red Bull isn't it.’

At this point Kanegan walks off and continues to play his latest FMM career, almost tripping over Broodje Kip who has already got lost on his way in.

Rob: ‘Riiiiight.’

 

The sparse crowd makes a rapturous noise as Kanegan and RichD finally manage to direct Broodje through the front door of the arena. Meanwhile, Mr Tree appears on the carpet.

Rob: ‘Mr Tree, Mr Tree, can I have a socially distanced word? Actually, do we need to socially distanced? Can trees get COVID? Pah... don’t know. Anyway, on to business.

Your legacy was cemented on Vibe last year when you won best career for your wonderful ‘Goal a Mile’ career where you travelled through the UK. But if you could choose any place in the world to travel to, where would you go, what would you do, and along with me who’d you also take?’

Mr Tree: ‘Wow - that's a great question. Really, I have a long list o fplaces I'd love to go, jeopardized by my wife (who hates flying!). So if I can ditch her and take you and comedian Dave Chappelle anywhere, I'd probably go for a trip to New Zealand and just roam around the beautiful country for a while...’

Rob: ‘Doesn’t the thread of angry Hobbits scare you away from New Zealand? And wouldn’t Chappelle just makes jokes about their height?’

Mr Tree: ‘And mine (I'm 6'8" hence the nickname!). But he seems a fun dude. And Hobbits aren't real, maaan...’

Mr Tree pats Rob on the head and ruffles his hair as he leaves. 

Rob: ‘Well... uh...I do not agree about Hobbits not being real. They are real. They make presents for Santa.’

Rob hears a noise through his earpiece and seems confused.

Rob: ‘I’ve been told by my editor that it turns out that Hobbits aren’t real and it’s Elves who make presents for Santa.  On that note, thank you for your time and back to the studio we go!’

 

Thank you for those enlightening interviews Handsome Rob but now it is time to reveal who has won the awards. The votes have been counted, recounted and then counted again and no one has any legal basis to mount a challenge against them.

 

Best Newcomer Award - Sponsored by Woody’s Steve Bruce Fan Club

This was a highly competitive category this year with all four nominees making an impression in there first few months in this corner of the internet. There was only two votes between all the nominees and we actually have a tie meaning two people take the award home.
 

Spoiler

Best Newcomers 2020 are @George Traistă and @RichD

 

Best Career Award - Sponsored by Mental Micky’s Dog Grooming

This is always a highly competitive award and this year it looked to be close between a few careers. My own TNS career was highly fancied (by myself) and it gave a “good” showing getting absolutely no votes at all. We had a clear winner though with 4 more votes than it’s nearest challenger.
 

Spoiler

Best career 2020 goes to @Kanegan for his 30 year Journeyman Pensioner career.

 

Best H2H - Sponsored by RichD Welsh Cakes, Turtle free since 2003

In previous years this award hasn’t had too many nominees but 2020 was a good year for H2H’s and hopefully that can continue in 2021 as they make for great careers to follow along to. This years winner was the most emphatic of all the categories winning by a margin of 9 votes.
 

Spoiler

Best H2H 2020 is awarded to The Warriors and @Rob @Ian @Woody and @FuddledFox

 

Best Article - Sponsored by The Lords Danish Chicken Sandwich Shop

The voting was close again for this award but we had a decisive winner taking the award by two votes.
 

Spoiler

Best Article 2020 goes to @BatiGoal for The Art of Asymmetrical Formations.

 

Best Community Event - Sponsored by Tits Bingo Halls

We had lots of fun events this year as many members looked to add some community fun into FMM20. The winner took the award by 3 votes though.

Spoiler

Best Community Event 2020 is awarded to the Vibe World Cup hosted by @FuddledFox


Biggest Fail - Sponsored by Will Grigg

This was a no contest as the fail that won took the award by 6 votes from his nearest competitor and with good reason.
 

Spoiler

Biggest fail of 2020 was @broodje kipcosting Team Asia a🥉 at the Vibe World Cup by using 8 ineligible players in the 3rd Place Playoff. 


We have two more awards to give out with the prestigious Member of the Year award and the Outstanding Achievement Award as well. Before that though we are lucky enough to have some musical entertainment.

Over lockdown many bands and artists tried to keep us entertained and few did as well or put as many smiles on peoples faces than Puddle of Mud with there cover of the Nirvana classic About a Girl. We are lucky enough tonight to have PoM here in The Green Dragon with us to perform.

 

Thank you to Puddle of Mud for that wonderful rendition.
 

So before we get thrown out the pub and fined £10k by the police for an illegal event during Lockdown 2.0 we had better get these final two awards given out.

Best Member - Sponsored by Jose de Sousa Counting School

This has to be the most coveted award of the evening as we crown our best member of the year. This was a closely fought contest but the winner took the title by 2 votes.

Spoiler

Congratulations to @Mr Tree for being Vibe’s 2020 Member or the Year.

The Outstanding Achievement Award - Sponsored by Gareth Ainsworth’s Leather Jacket

This award is handed out every year to the member who has achieved something “great” and is voted for by an esteemed panel of Vibe elders. Previous winners include @Ashez in 2018 for his dedication to the rhetorical question and last year @samhardy took the award for making a two season career last 9 months worth of updates. I think you can see that it takes a special level of achievement to even be considered for this prestigious award.

Hopefully everyone reading this has gotten through 2020 relatively unscathed but even so I’m sure we can all agree 2020 has been a bit shit. It has been a year where we have needed hero’s and people who are unwavering in there philosophies and although we have had lots of the former I’m not sure the latter could be said about many of the worlds leaders.

One man could have taught the leaders of the world a few things though about picking a plan, making a philosophy and then sticking to it with a concrete will and determination. That man is @SSolas and he is the winner of this years Outstanding Achievement Award.

That brings us to the end of this years awards. Thank you to @Rob for his work on the red carpet and to @samhardy for gathering up all the nominations and votes.

Lets hope 2021 is a good year for FMM and for Vibe and we will see you all here again next year for the 2021 awards.

Thanks for reading.

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Excellent stuff lads and jeez, that was a surprise and an honour to see I'd got that prestigious award! Well done to @Kaneganfor his thoroughly deserved Rear of the Year award, and to all other winners too of course! Here's to a great FMM21 season! 

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Well done boys, great ceremony! Congrats to all the winners, and all users to this forum, it's a fun place that makes you want to compete and get better. 🙌

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Enjoyed reading that, few bits made me laugh 😁

I’ve only been on here mere few months and I’ve really enjoyed it on here, very welcoming site and im happy to share the award with @George Traistă I’ll keep the award for the first 6 months before I mail it to you. But before that I’d like to thank the turtles for shaping me up to being the man turtle I am today. 
 

Well done to all involved in the awards, you’re all great and I love you.

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46 minutes ago, RichD said:

Enjoyed reading that, few bits made me laugh 😁

I’ve only been on here mere few months and I’ve really enjoyed it on here, very welcoming site and im happy to share the award with @George Traistă I’ll keep the award for the first 6 months before I mail it to you. But before that I’d like to thank the turtles for shaping me up to being the man turtle I am today. 
 

Well done to all involved in the awards, you’re all great and I love you.

Ok, we have a deal, there you have it 🤣

 

award.jpg

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11 minutes ago, George Traistă said:

Ok, we have a deal, there you have it 🤣

 

award.jpg

I’ll be printing that off and putting it on my wall for sure 👀🤣

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Great job @Mr Tree and all other winners . Thoroughly deserved and thanks to everyone who voted for me in the Career of the Year. 

Looking forward to even better FMM 21.

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33 minutes ago, Scratch said:

Huge congrats @Mr Tree, @Kanegan, @RichD, @George Traistă, @broodje kip@Rob,  @Ian@Woody@FuddledFox@BatiGoal and @SSolas for winning awards! 

Also big thanks to @samhardy and @FuddledFox (and @Rob) for organising and presenting and helping keep this site running etc. Epic write up there too (I guess that was you Foxy?). Just waiting for the Netflix version now... 😄

 

I like Amazon’s documentary a lot more. Remember the Man City and Spurs one? It’s amazing

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2 hours ago, Scratch said:

Epic write up there too (I guess that was you Foxy?)

All the boring stuff was me and then Handsome @Rob and the people he asked questions to take the credit for that section.

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Congrats to all the winners and to all contributors to this epic Award ceremony 👏
It was a fantastic year indeed and I'm looking forward to the new one with (hopefully) more contribution from my side.

Edited by zila90

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4 hours ago, broodje kip said:

I like Amazon’s documentary a lot more. Remember the Man City and Spurs one? It’s amazing

Don't have Amazon unfortunately, but we've got Netflix and the Sunderland one was fantastic (and I'm a Newcastle fan!). 

But whoever picks this up, I'm expecting a drama filled show, with unexpected tension behind the scenes, drama about where to locate it (difficult calls with Wembley, a long search for other venues, before eventually settling for @FuddledFox's local), lawsuits from Mike Ashley (and maybe even some Vibers!), the long stressful drawn out scenes (over several episodes) covering @Rob learning his Hazmat suit has been punctured, being tested, awaiting the results, before eventually get the all clear near the end, etc. Oh and probably a court injunction from @Jens to stop the votes being counted...

Netflix or Amazon, what are you waiting for? This is gold... Send someone along to the Green Dragon to discuss terms with Mr Fox... 

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Well i missed the awards as i was busy with Sexy Sue so im here catching up!

A brilliant ceremony @Rob and @FuddledFox. Very pleased to have won an award with you 2 and @Ian

Congrats to all of last nights winners too.

Edited by Woody

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Thank you so much for the award! Really touched and means a lot to me. Your all so good on here and love being a part of the community. 

I hope people find some of my posts interesting and helpful. 

Thank you again so much! 🏆

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