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Rob

Career Pipi tries dual 1kc gls ✅ & 1kc assists ✅ - The End

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Season 19

We went in to season 19 with two years of contract left, Pipi at 919 goals and 770 assists, and a glorious 1kc goals in sight.

Seeing as the past two seasons had given us 52 goals and 59 assists you’d think getting 81 goals in two seasons was easy.

Well it wasn’t. A massive drop of both goals and assists meant he scored 31 and assisted 28, which for a 35 year old piece of turd is a decent result but not what is needed.

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One season of contract remaining before he retires and 50 goals needed. Sometimes I hate this game!

Spoiler

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EB59C8BB-6414-4DF4-B30F-325FE1A1A3B7.thumb.jpeg.b855704985e5eea15f4be775cb5d1a04.jpeg

Thanks for reading!

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FFS! That's some drop. Understandable considering his age & decline in stats. Unless you can get him to keep playing, 50 goals is probably a step too far. Which would be a real shame.

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This is still a belter of a career and about 3 or 4 times the most I've got of a player, for scoring or assisting, never mind both! Fingers crossed you get another contract out of him

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1 hour ago, Dai_ said:

FFS! That's some drop. Understandable considering his age & decline in stats. Unless you can get him to keep playing, 50 goals is probably a step too far. Which would be a real shame.

Yep! Honestly, when I had 81 to go in two seasons I thought it would be procedural. Then… meh. I agree though, thanks.

54 minutes ago, StuartM said:

This is still a belter of a career and about 3 or 4 times the most I've got of a player, for scoring or assisting, never mind both! Fingers crossed you get another contract out of him

Thanks Stuart - kind words. I know the write ups have been a bit minimalist but it became a bit repetitive early on. 

16 minutes ago, FuddledFox said:

Drop or not I think Pipi has another 10 years left in him at the top level.

Thanks Foxy. As positive as ever.

added 0 minutes later
Just now, Woody said:

He will resign realising he needs you more than you need him.

You can do this!

Imagine if the game actually held that kind of emotion. Thanks Woodster

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13 minutes ago, Rich said:

Can honestly see him breaking both legs next season. 
 

Well done though, very good going 😝

Thanks Rickydick. 

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5 hours ago, broodje kip said:

Great total but that’s a huge drop. Quick, pack your back and move to China!

Thanks Sandwich. China is the last place I’d move! 🇨🇳 

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Season 20

Going in to season 20 Pipi had one year of contract left before retiring and needed 50 goals to get to a goals 1kc.

The utter piece of turd managing to get a hat-trick in a game should give me hope, eh?

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To be honest, it was hope we didn’t need as right at the start of the season this happened:

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Another five years on the contract, that meant another four after this one ends, which was just as well as Pipi bagged a respectable, but otherwise disappointing in terms of what I need, 30 goals.

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This means he is at 980 with four years of contract left. His assists stand at a decent 819. Four years to get 20 goals should be doable and getting to that point in season 21 is my main target. After that I’ll try and improve assists.

Spoiler

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38B75931-3967-41A6-9BC8-126972ABD36D.thumb.jpeg.cb9480cbfbfd9701adfbb20868457163.jpeg

Thanks for reading!

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5 minutes ago, Rich said:

Awesome going, your tactic is getting the best out of him, well done and nice to see him sign for longer👍

Thanks Rich. No snide comment - you are a changed man!

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Sweet! Panic over. He's reconsidered. 

Another decent season. All things considered. 

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4 hours ago, Dai_ said:

Sweet! Panic over. He's reconsidered. 

Another decent season. All things considered. 

Thanks boss man. Chuffed to bits over here when he signed it. 

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Season 21
20 goals were needed for the 36/37 year old Pipi to get the 1kc goals. 

We got a nice brace in one game from him…

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…but other than that it was a struggle.

Yet he did it. Hilariously he got exactly the 20 goals needed.

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This leaves us with 1,000 goals and 838 assists. My attention now turned on to increasing the assists, with 900 as the target considering we have only 3 years of contract before he retires. Obviously I’ll try to keep him going as long as possible… so my stretch target is 1kc assists too.

But, yeah, 1,000 goals… done and dusted!

Spoiler

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7DA265CF-5CA1-402D-B79B-8B8D8331279D.thumb.jpeg.8fb866f5a135faf2a3ff33232e8010f1.jpeg

Thanks for reading!

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Brilliant! Happy he's got the 1kc goals for you. Considering he looks like shit now too. 😆

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10 minutes ago, Dai_ said:

Brilliant! Happy he's got the 1kc goals for you. Considering he looks like shit now too. 😆

Thank you! I am amazed how much he manages to grind out whilst being poop. The best is yet to come, mind. 

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Well done Rob, that’s great going getting the 1k goals. Be awesome if you got the assists as well, but that’s going to be tough. Good luck cause you need it as you’re shit.

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Congrats mate, on a career that isn't solely focussed on goals you have achieved greatness.

well done mate and I'm sure Pipi will crawl his ass over the line for you.

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1 hour ago, Rich said:

Well done Rob, that’s great going getting the 1k goals. Be awesome if you got the assists as well, but that’s going to be tough. Good luck cause you need it as you’re poop.

And there is my beautiful insult. I’ve removed the offending word from my quote as we, at Vibe, do not condone swearing. Thank you for the compliment element.

1 hour ago, Woody said:

Congrats mate, on a career that isn't solely focussed on goals you have achieved greatness.

well done mate and I'm sure Pipi will crawl his ass over the line for you.

Cheers Woodster. Yeah, it’s focussed on a bit of both. Everything important goes through the bloke, but he bizarrely doesn’t register a huge amount of passes. He just gets the ball in key areas.

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On 08/05/2021 at 05:23, Rob said:

Compliment buried in an insult, hahah. Just as I was about to post something I think you’d appreciate in another thread. Thanks though... sort of.

Is it a compliment buried in an insult or an insult buried in a compliment. I can never tell with Rich! 😄

Anyway great work on making the 1KC - I can't imagine doing it with so many assists, I get upset if my striker gets 10 assists in a season! Anyway, full steam ahead to 1K assists! Though, he is looking slightly worse for wear... 

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4 hours ago, Scratch said:

Is it a compliment buried in an insult or an insult buried in a compliment. I can never tell with Rich! 😄

Anyway great work on making the 1KC - I can't imagine doing it with so many assists, I get upset if my striker gets 10 assists in a season! Anyway, full steam ahead to 1K assists! Though, he is looking slightly worse for wear... 

Thanks fella.

I totally get what you are saying with being upset. I used to get a bit wound up if we won, say, 5-0 and he didn’t score, then I would look at the assists and notice he’d set up a few and become happier.

The seasons are so rinse and repeat at this point though and I understand the tactic and game routines a lot more than at the start. For example if I see one of my central midfielders have scored I know that Pipi will have assisted. It’s like the game only has a set amount of ‘plays’. Same with your current 1kc assists attempt. I feel like these challenges are all about creating angles on the pitch that benefit certain ‘plays’.

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· Posted (edited)
6 minutes ago, Rob said:

Thanks fella.

I totally get what you are saying with being upset. I used to get a bit wound up if we won, say, 5-0 and he didn’t score, then I would look at the assists and notice he’d set up a few and become happier.

The seasons are so rinse and repeat at this point though and I understand the tactic and game routines a lot more than at the start. For example if I see one of my central midfielders have scored I know that Pipi will have assisted. It’s like the game only has a set amount of ‘plays’. Same with your current 1kc assists attempt. I feel like these challenges are all about creating angles on the pitch that benefit certain ‘plays’.

"Plays". Don't go all American handball on us, pal. Please! 😄

Edited by Dai_

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21 minutes ago, Rob said:

Thanks fella.

I totally get what you are saying with being upset. I used to get a bit wound up if we won, say, 5-0 and he didn’t score, then I would look at the assists and notice he’d set up a few and become happier.

The seasons are so rinse and repeat at this point though and I understand the tactic and game routines a lot more than at the start. For example if I see one of my central midfielders have scored I know that Pipi will have assisted. It’s like the game only has a set amount of ‘plays’. Same with your current 1kc assists attempt. I feel like these challenges are all about creating angles on the pitch that benefit certain ‘plays’.

Yeah, exactly like my current 1KC attempt. I see Scamacca score and I know there's a 80% chance there's an assist from Cangiani. And I don't need to think much at all, just rinse and repeat. I was going to pause it and do the DT save, but I've been busy and prefer the rinse and repeat saves at the moment..

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1 hour ago, Dai_ said:

"Plays". Don't go all American handball on us, pal. Please! 😄

Haha, sorry! Naughty Rob.

1 hour ago, Scratch said:

Yeah, exactly like my current 1KC attempt. I see Scamacca score and I know there's a 80% chance there's an assist from Cangiani. And I don't need to think much at all, just rinse and repeat. I was going to pause it and do the DT save, but I've been busy and prefer the rinse and repeat saves at the moment..

Absolutely, and the benefits of rinse and repeat is you can do it whilst doing other stuff.

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Seasons 22 and 23

Two more seasons to plod through before the final season of Pipi’s contract (again).

Season 22 involved me tweaking a tactical instruction and getting 35 assists. Pipi also bagged three in a game.

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However, we dropped out of Europe in the first knockout…

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…so ‘clever’ me reverted back to my original tactic in season 23. We got further in Europe but the scales tilted back in favour of goals. Still, only six more assists to go until the magic 900! Rubbish Pipi also grabbed another hat-trick, which is stupid.

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The game is pathetic at times. 

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Spoiler

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Thanks for reading!

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1 minute ago, Rich said:

Involved in a goal a game at the age of 38 is ridiculous, well done Rob. Pipi is so much better at 38 than yourself.

we shall see when I am 38, but thanks though.

4 minutes ago, Dai_ said:

What a guy! Decent seasons when you think about it. 🤣

Thank! Yeah, I am really pleased. We are in to the realms of a tactic getting goals and assists as opposed to a player.

Next season is his last year though. Or is it….?

DUN DUN DUUUUUNNNN!

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